Joe and John Present...The BIG Tri-State Tour: Day 30

Well, we said these blogs would be up by the end of the weekend we were back, and it turns out it's taken until the end of the month! Maybe it was the jetlag, maybe we needed time to recover from the Circus Circus buffet, or maybe we were just reluctant to finish our beloved blog off because we enjoy writing it so much. In any case, bearing the phrase 'better late than never' firmly in mind, here it is: the full account of our last day in the USA. It's a monster-size blog too...how long have you got??

We awoke quite early in our queen-size beds, wanting to make the best use of our day in Vegas. We have to admit though - we were tired, and fairly worn-out by now from the trip as a whole. Still, we were immensely excited to explore Vegas, having heard/seen so much about the iconic city over the years. This, then, (along with the thought of breakfast, obviously), was enough to propel us from our beds and encourage us to have a short primping session. Before we knew it, we found ourselves bleary-eyed down at one of the hotel Cafes. Needing to engergise ourselves for the day, two hot-chocolates were purchased, as were two 'breakfast croissants'. The latter, you may be interested to know, refers not to a plain croissant available for breakfast (oh no...), but instead to an entire breakfast packed into a (giant) croissant. Having temporaily forgotten about the aforementioned buffet from last night, these seemed like a good idea at the time of ordering. Half-way through, however, it was a slighty different story - as we started to feel rather full. Soldiering on, we munched through our regret and then went over to the nearby business 'suite' to try and blog the events of the previous day. As readers will know, however, the internet prices were not-so-suite, they were ridiculously high, so we moved on, hence the blogging delay.

Prices, incidently, were not the only thing around that could be described as 'ridiculously high'. No, our first destination upon leaving the hotel for the day also fits this description. We were on course for the 'Stratosphere' hotel/casino, which, as the name suggests, is a very tall building. We did first stop at the Sahara hotel to try and go on an intruiging rollercoaster that appeared to go completely vertically upwards, but it wasn't running midweek, and hence there were no more excuses for delaying our Stratosphere experience. The 'sphere building stretches roughly 1000ft straight up into the Vegas sky. It has no middle levels, just an expansive casino and shopping area at the bottom, and then a number of...well, 'interesting' attractions at the top of the thin concrete tower. There's the standard Vegas hotel fare - the wedding chapel (785 feet), the private function rooms (808 feet), the romantic restaurant (844 feet), but then, at the very top, 3 more innovative features... namely the world's highest thrill rides. The photo below (with ourselves standing next to the diagram) serves as a fairly good guide to the thrills on offer, as does the video. Basically, the first ride is 'Big Shot', a purely vertical speed ride that takes you up to the Stratosphere's maximum height of 1,149 feet (and hence is the highest thrill ride of any sort in the world). Then there's the small matter of 'Insanity', a claw-like contraption which, whilst spinning, dips anyone foolish enough to ride it over the edge of the tower. The final ride, 'X-Scream', is a sort of rocket/slide that not so much dips as fires its riders over the edge, only to hoist them back up then repeat this process vigourously. These rides are fully visible from the bottom of the tower, and so we approached with caution - knowing we had to face the challenge of the Stratosphere, but at the same time not quite knowing why we were putting ourselves through it. Laughing nervously, we tried to look cool, stay calm, and hold the quiver from our voices as we ventured inside the hotel, and bought unlimited all-day passes for the rides. Armed with the yellow wristbands that come with such a purchase, we made the lift journey up to the observation deck (from which the rides looked even worse), and went outside...

We boarded the rides in the order that we've described them...and it's probably fair to say that this is also increasing 'scare order'; 'Big Shot' was of course terrifying, especially first thing in the morning, but going upwards didn't quite have the same fundamental fear-factor that going over the edge did. We were also too busy gasping at the Nevada view to be worried. The 'Insanity' claw was next, and as the gates at the side of the tower dropped and the claw moved over the side we once again contemplated why exactly we were doing this; particularly as we were actually the only two people on the ride that time, and so had to sit on opposite sides to balance things out. Midway through the ride though, we'd adjusted into it, and it was pure fun. Proud of our achievements, we finally braved 'X-Scream', and then lined up again just to get the front two seats (having been someway back in the queue last time). This was probably the worst for scares, but it was also the most thrilling, especially as the ride dips directly over the strip, giving more amazing views.

Having congratulated ourselves repeatedly on going on the big three, and having seen the obligatory official Stratosphere photographs that are shown to you when leaving any ride, we descended back onto the Vegas strip. Our appetite for thrills may have been satisfied, but it was nearing lunchtime, so, as was only reasonable, we went to a Subway for 'light' bite to eat. In Vegas, pretty much everything is located inside a Casino complex, and this Subway was no different, and so it was quite a surreal experience eating our sandwiches amidst the slots. We then moved out back onto the strip and waited for the 'Deuce' bus (the system that runs up and down the strip...essential and popular due to the sweltering heat). Once it had arrived, we crammed on with the rest of the tourists - one mentioning to us amid the crush that we could have afforded a limo, because we looked a lot like, shall we say...a certain teen pop sensation. We had the necessary 'we get that a lot...it's the hair...we're not actually related' discussion with the kindly woman, and then continued to ride the duece to our next stop - New York, New York.

No, we weren't travelling back cross-country to Roger's house, but instead going to the famous hotel. The New York, New York hotel (and Casino... you might have caught on by now) is a striking tribute to the city's most famous structures. Hotel tower blocks are copies of the Empire State and Chrysler buildings (to name just two), and there is a mini Manhatten bridge, along with a replica of the Statue of Liberty that can't be far off the size of the original. Awed (particularly having been in the real big apple only weeks before), we stepped inside, and after snapping up a few photos, we sought out the biggest and best track rollercoaster in Vegas...named the 'Manhatten Express'. The Express has an innocent exterior, as the front of it is shaped like a friendly NY taxi, and there's a quaint yellow and black colour theme running through the carriages. Don't be fooled, though. This is a very long, fast rollercoaster, which, to quote the NY NY website "will lift you up 203 feet, drop you down 144 feet and leave your pulse trying to catch up to 67 mph". Let's just say that you couldn't 'do a video blog' on this particular coaster. We thought it was fantastic though, a really enjoyable contrast to the more stationary thrills of the stratosphere, and so we did it again. Yes...to get the front two seats. So, after "getting our negative g's on" (the website again), we explored the casino and shopping area, before returning to the sun-drenched strip.

Having decided that we'd done enough roller-coasting (for now), we embarked on a tour of the other main hotels on the strip. From NY, we walked across the highway bridge to the MGM Grand. For Ocean's 11 fans, yes, this is one of 'Terry Benedict's' three casinos - though it's also famous in its own right, and, of course, for its historic Metro-Golden-Mayer links to the movie business. Today, the hotel clearly has some strong links with the TV industry, and no sooner had we stepped in the door than we were invited to a free screening of a new television show (taking place shortly within the hotel). The aim of this was to basically survey people's opinions of new shows, giving the results to networks as part of the decision-making process for whether or not they should go/stay on air. Being the media moguls that we are, we couldn't decline such an offer, and so we happily accepted, wondering what the mystery show would be. It turned out to be a new CBS comedy called 'The Ex-List', essentially a fairly standard romantic dramedy about a woman tracking down all her ex's to look again for the right man. We accepted that we probably weren't the target audience, and whilst the show wasn't ex-ceptional viewing, it was passable, and made all the better by a scene about....ultimate frisbee! We had to monitor our reactions on a moment-by-moment basis (turning a dial to reflect our interest level...which obviously peaked to the maximum 100 at the inclusion of disc sports), and then also fill out a more comprehensive survey at the end. The process was probably as exciting as the show, but it was a very interesting experience, and one we were glad that we'd stumbled across.

We then left the MGM and continued our trek round the main hotels. We walked right down to the Southern tip of the strip to see the Luxor, an eygptian themed marvel that was shaped as a pyramid and with a huge sphinx in front (large enough to be visible from the air when we flew into Vegas the previous day). We posed with a few Pharohs, then reversed and went back along the strip and into Excalibur, a stunning castle-themed complex. From here, we moved through the interesting attractions of M+M's world (yeah, we went to the New York one, so the Vegas one was essential too) and Coca Cola world. Both are amazingly not hotels and don't have any slots, so the plethora of flavours of M+M's, and the range of retro Coca Cola merchandise made for a nice relief from flashing lights and noisy machines. We rejoined the gambling world at 'Paris', a hotel themed, shockingly, on the French capital, and boasting a large Eiffel Tower replica.

As it was starting to go dark, this was an ample oppurtunity to head across to the hotel opposite Paris - the Bellagio (Ocean's 11 fans...check), to watch the iconic fountain show. There is a large pool (really, it's a mini lake) just infront of the elegant hotel, which every half hour, we had heard, is home to the jet-fountain display seen at the end of the said 'Ocean's' film. We waited until half 7, and weren't disappointed. The scale of the fountain jets, in terms of height and width, was astonishing in itself, but the fountains were also co-ordinated precisely with music (Sinatra's 'Luck Be a Lady'), and lit up beautifully. We've filmed some of the spectacular 'routine' (see below), although some kind soul has also put a video of the entire thing up on youtube HERE.

We then went inside the Bellagio itself, and had a walk around to see the many interesting shops, rooms, and art displays on offer - as well as just taking in the casino surroundings of Vegas' most prestigious hotel. One of the art pieces was a ceiling full of Dale Chihuly's glass seaforms and flowers, and so naturally, being experts (thanks again, Alicia), we took the oppurtunity to noisily discuss his status as a prodigiously prolific artist whose work so effectively balances content with an investigation of glass' properties of translucency and transparency. Nice one, Dale. Sadly, no-one seemed overly-impressed by our critique, so we decided to move on, into the adjoining Ceasars Palace complex.

After a ten-minute walk through this particular hotel (Roman-palace themed, naturally), we arrived at the place we had decided to dine for our last USA evening meal. We were completing the pan-USA circle, and dining at Planet Hollywood Las Vegas, twenty seven days after our idyllic evening with Kerry (see day 3) at PH New York. Interestingly, PH Vegas is actually the closest restaurant of the franchise to Hollywood itself..as there isn't actually one in the whole of LA. We stepped inside and were taken to our table in the movie-themed eatery, and sat ready - awaiting the waitress service almost as eagerly as the food. The latter was fantastic - we ordered the same meals as in New York, and they lived up to expectations, as did the sumptous 'hand-dipped' milkshakes that we got to accompany them. Sadly, the waitress wasn't quite so spectacular as Kerry in any regard - the acid test was asking her what exactly a 'hand-dipped' milkshake actually was. Whereas Kerry (in answer to the same question) had given us a detailed explanation of the Planet Hollywood milkshake dipping process that gives the creamy texture to the drinks, our Las Vegas waitress replied that it was "just a milkshake". Nevermind - she was friendly enough, and was always being compared to impossible standards anyway.

We left Hollywood and Caesars, and started to head back down the strip to our hotel. Our path was obstructed, however, by a large, packed crowd standing outside 'Treasure Island' hotel and waiting for (as we discovered by asking around) a 'pirate show'. There was, admittedly, a large ship set up in water outside the hotel, and so this seemed a reasonable claim. We joined them, and stood waiting for the show. After a fair wait, and some delay due to 'weather' apparently (there was a couple of mph wind, which is a supposedly a storm by Vegas standards), the show began. It was interesting enough, with some good special effects, and a second ship 'sailing' into the fray (that lot from Pittsburgh probably had something to do with it). However, it was also quite bizzare, as it mostly just consisted of girls dancing cheesily in bikins on board a pirate ship. Now, let's be clear - there's nothing inherently wrong with this idea, but with our theatrical minds critically engaged, we left underwhelmed.

We walked the rest of the length of the strip back to our hotel, and collapsed on our beds, after a long day in the sun, with lots of walking. It was approaching midnight, and we were just contemplating turning in for the night, when an idea hit us. We were still wearing our yellow wristbands from the morning's Stratosphere session...and so still had our all day passes. Hence, yeah, you guessed it...we forgot all thought of going to bed and got up, walked back to the Stratosphere (only a few minutes from the hotel), and did all the 1000ft rides again (they're open until 2am), in the pitch black. It was worth it...a view of Vegas in the day is spectacular, but in the night, with the strip lit up in all its neon glory, it's something else. We gawped at the Panoramas, enjoyed the thrills once more, and reminisced about the past 30 days, feeling truly on top of the world (to steal a Stratosphere tagline).